does it matter?

i came up with this blog to serve as a venue for me to broadcast whatever harebrained thought enters this head of mine (see my first ever blog). But what happened is, from a serious webby award contender, this excuse for a blogspot turned into a photo album. Yup, I can be creative when it comes to that. Ive been down and out in the blogging industry and i know all of you out there have been waiting for my next meaningful blog. Hate to dissapoint you for the nth time! Ha! Anyway, i hate this thing on my wrist. Ive been busy acting like a badminton player lately which i think is taking a toll on me. 'Dude, whats that lump on your wrist??'. I have also been experiencing a whole lotta first lately. i wont elaborate but think nothing sexual (you freaky perv). I came to realize that even the small things matter. Again, nothing to do with that, you bastos you.. I hate (ok, too strong of a word), that even the little things bother me. Why do things always get complicated? I was excited about the thought of having you as a bestfriend. Then why do you make things between us complicated? I hate to think that youre not happy for me.. At the end of the day, I dont want to regret our 'chemistry' for being the reason why we're here, at this point. I thought we're here to make things better for each other when all the things we abhor teams up to get us.. Hey m not doing well right now, where are you?? Damn women, tends to let their emotion get the better of them. Oh well.. And on another 'aspect', if you think this is too much (its harder for me than what ive shown, believe me..) I am also bothered that Im bothered about the little details.. I envy the fact that you have ur pic taken with him. Or with her. Or with them. But not with me.. I hate the fact that you wont tell me things unless I ask you about it. I dont understand it when you think that i dont trust you when I let you do all the things you want to do. Please, dont assume the worst about me. I'm not him... I dont know why you even have to ask? And i hate to think that youre not exerting much effort cause you think that this wont work from the very start... Leading me to think.. I dunno. You tell me... But despite all these, I wont let things between us change. Not even a little. But of course, you've got to work with me also...